Blue Light

September 29, 2021 ~ Niecy ~ Leave a comment

Darkness to the right,

Darkness to the left

Quiet, stillness, contemplation

A place we’ve all been

Respite from the day’s duties

Rejuvenate, prepare for another day

Blue light before me

The constant companion

I could sleep, I should slumber

Once again, it escapes me

Neck on pillow, back comfortably resting

Mellow music meant to lull me away

Faint sounds of him sleeping near me

Warmth of protection covers me

The scene is set as it should be

A ritual of sorts known to all

Blue light still shining

The constant companion

I could sleep, I should slumber

Once again it escapes me

This dance in the dark

Knowing it will not allow

What my mind and body require

Words begin to form in my mind

I feel the thoughts illuminate

Wanting to be expressed

The blue light still shining

The constant companion

I could sleep, I should slumber

Once again it escapes me

Musings and Concerns

September 21, 2021 ~ Niecy ~ Leave a comment

Some things I’ve really thought about. I don’t take my decisions lightly. We all want to get back to some kind of normalcy, but need each others’ help to do so. Just some other things I’ve questioned:

*What’s in that heart dewormer peeps are taking for Covid prevention?
*What’s in our processed food that so many often eat? It sure tastes good in many cases.
*What’s in or on our fruit and veggies that we often eat, organic or otherwise? Am I spending enough time cleaning them? I really love fruit!
*What’s in a polio vaccine and how often do I see it today?
*Why don’t I see measles more today? I remember it was different when I was a child.
*What’s in cancer meds that help so many get a second chance at life? It’s rough, I hear.
*What’s in the flu shot that has made my arm sore, but helped me not get a flu or serious respiratory issue for many years, even having an auto immune disease? I used to get them over and over in my earlier years, even as a child.
*What’s in the meds that I’ve taken for years to help me live a good life with Scleroderma when it could be so much worse?
*What exactly is in Tylenol that helps me feel a little bit better when my body or head aches?
*Why did peeps die so young before the 20th century? They often looked much older back then in pics I’ve seen.
*Why do so many women go to a hospital to have their babies now? They didn’t always.
*Why am I’m seeing death around me and then hearing peeps were unvaccinated, but could have been?
*Why am I seeing my friends and family so grief stricken? It’s all around lately.
*Why are peeps screaming freedom and liberty over a health and safety issue?
*Why is it a Trump or Biden, Republican or Democrat, Christian or not, Buddhist or Muslim… Do I really feel so correct in my convictions that I refuse to consider other points of view? Have I ever been wrong in something I once believed strongly?
*Why do peeps argue about our founding fathers’ ideas, but not see that Church and State are separate or meant to be?
*Why did the men in planes scream, “Allahu Akbar,” when taking over a plane and killing so many on Sept. 11? They certainly felt they were doing God’s work and I do not hate all Muslims because of these few.
*Why can I see love and goodness in individuals of all types, skin color, beliefs, ethnicities… when other hate so easily?
*Why are people so afraid of others that may look or act different, enough to create violence over it?
*Why are sports and entertainment peeps paid so much, valued so highly, when people with real value to our growth like teachers, speech therapists, autism specialists, road construction workers, nurses, and more not? Who has been really vital in society through the years, not to mention the pandemic?
*Why are parents and friends in the stands at their kids’ sporting events using foul language and fighting amongst themselves when sports are meant to teach teamwork and discipline?
*Why is it so important to keep the rich rich and the poor poor? Is there a way to combine capitalism with a bit of socialism to pull people up from poverty and dead ends? Heck, I love money, nice things, vacations… I would not be able to enjoy it all and see others suffer, however. I know I can’t help everyone, but even today, I give what I can and still live a great life.

Yes, my thoughts have gone all over the place. I just have such trouble understanding some things, but I do research, ponder, ask…

I know I will die one day. Everyone does. There’s no getting around it. Life is short. How I spend my time here – value, love, respect, empathy, compassion, understanding, purpose – is what I focus on. What more can I really do?

I may not be everyone’s cup of tea, but I know in my body and soul, I am a good person who cares. I try to understand, but some things make no sense to me. That’s all.

Against the Wall

August 24, 2021August 24, 2021 ~ Niecy ~ Leave a comment

Deep yearning yet nothing but disappointment

Anxious to serve others and be of use

Still lonely patiently waiting

Not to be forgotten, rather benefit

Against the wall you sit

Sleek, lean, quiet, and sturdy

The color of night, jet black with no fading

No wear, shiny still, small particles of dust

In a forever sleep waiting to be awakened

Memories of excitement when new

The switch would be moved to on

Progress shown in bright illumination

Firm but comfortable seat,

Pedals to fill each foot

Cables strung throughout,

Handles for arms, so much potential

Drips of sweat would enlighten

Smells not a problem and expected

The comfort of heavy breathing sounds

More energy a desired result

Not made for hanging an unworn mat

Space not perfect as it seems for the roller

Looking new in purposeful anticipation

This beautiful machine on cold tile

So why still sitting, this heart rate helper

Not a piece of furniture, nor a place to forget

Goals can be set, success a new feeling

If only this beautiful bike would emerge again!

Never Enough

April 29, 2020May 3, 2020 ~ Niecy ~ Leave a comment

The irony
Kindness, tolerance, love for others
Struggle with own acceptance

So easy to find interest, humor, beauty elsewhere
While beating up oneself
Never enough, must do better

The fears
Seeing strength through the years
Yet frightened by fading youth, obvious change

Knowing the clock is ticking, fatigued by it all
Still there is a push, even a pull
To live fully, to feel true quality

The inner beauty
Years building strength, learning to love
To fully appreciate the growth

One day, smiles abound
Awareness of sweet soul and desire
Another, frustration and maddening weariness

The fight
For purpose, importance, health
Secure of a memorable existence, a legacy

Whom is it for? Me? Others? The Lord?
Imaginary need, undeserving insecurity
Or just human nature to seek?

The days
Do not cease, no stopping the clock
Cannot go back, impossible to redo

Time for respite, justified awareness
Emotional hole full, knowing real worth
Just too long, this struggle

No more never enough

Excitement!

July 27, 2016July 27, 2016 ~ Niecy ~ Leave a comment

I am just writing a quick post to say I have written a short true story. It is in the revision stage, but the major work is done and I’m excited! This story is autobiographical beginning shortly before I met my husband and married. The focus is really about the difficulties of having children after a diagnosis of a serious disease. It sounds very sad, and is to a point, but the rest of the story is inspiring and joyful. I want to try to sell it to a magazine that looks for inspirational true stories. That work comes later.

Right now, I have two friends looking at it and plan to ask my sister-in-law to give me her thoughts. All three are big readers and intelligent women. Two are writers, one published, the other not. I want readers to be touched and have a tearful experience while reading. (My husband read it and a few tears developed.) We all need a goal in our writing and a focus on our audience, right?

More coming on this project later. I hope all you writers out there are in the midst of interesting projects as well.